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Posts tagged ‘Cougar Dating’

Why Men Like Older Women

cougar looking for younger menReason #1: Older women avoid putting pressure on the men they date

Want to know the quickest way in a budding relationship to send a man running in the opposite direction? Pressure him about settling down, “putting a ring on it” or having kids — things that a woman in her mid-to-late 40s and early 50s hardly ever does with her dates. “Because she’s not at an age where her biological clock is ticking loudly or all of her friends are just getting married, the desire to settle down isn’t an older woman’s main romantic goal,” explains Jennifer Bidwell, a dating and relationships coach in Washington, D.C. “This is a huge reason why a man — especially a younger one who isn’t completely ready for all of those life-changing experiences — will be attracted to someone in her 40s or 50s,” says Bidwell. To avoid putting an uncomfortable squeeze on the man you’re seeing, Bidwell advises adopting a couldn’t-care-less attitude about getting serious — even if it’s really your top priority: “By adopting that cougar-esque practice of acting nonchalant about commitment in the early stages of a relationship, you’ll allow your guy to give himself to you more freely and completely, because he won’t feel the weight of your need to find Mr. Right right now.”

Reason #2: Older women keep it classy when they go out looking to meet men

Though Girls Gone Wild-type behavior seems to be de rigeur (in bars and clubs after midnight, anyway), most women in their 40s and 50s know better than to lie across a bar and offer a random stranger the chance to do a body shot off of them. “Sadly, skanky going-out behavior seems to be the norm amongst many young single women these days,” Bidwell explains. “It may be alluring on a purely ‘I’d like to sleep with her’ level, but no man I’ve ever met wants to enter into a serious relationship with a woman who struts into the bar with her boobs falling out of her dress, gets sloppily drunk, or seductively dances on tables at a club.” It’s OK to have a regrettable ladies’ night out when you’re with your girlfriends, but if you’re looking for a real relationship, keep your nightlife behavior strictly above-board, Bidwell advises: “When you’re out and looking to attract a man, make like an older woman and sip on a classic cocktail — like a dirty martini or a Manhattan — and dress to look pretty, not be provocative.”

Reason #3: Older women know their way around the bedroom

It’s no secret that men love physical affection, but as with anything, not all intimacy is created equal. Because midlife women sometimes have 20 (or more) years of experience over their younger counterparts, their seduction know-how can be pretty extensive — and really, what man would complain about a woman who knows exactly how to please him? “Experience used to disqualify women from being respectable sexual partners; but now, that same experience has value — and it’s part of what many men are looking for,” says Dr. Pepper Schwartz, author of Prime: Adventures and Advice on Sex, Love, and the Sensual Years. In order to make up for your relative lack of experience, she suggests reading up on some new techniques. “There are countless books, videos, websites and even blogs on these techniques, all of which can be accessed in the privacy of your own home,” Bidwell advises. She also suggests asking lots of questions when you’re in bed together: “Not all men like the same things, but there are a few constants. The easiest way to learn is to come right out and ask your partner what he likes and what feels good to him, and then remember it for the next time — whether it’s with him or someone else!”

Reason #4: Older women can pick up the tab (and actually enjoy doing it)

Sure, men usually enjoy treating a woman to a romantic evening out, but Dr. Schwartz says there’s something awfully sexy about a woman who’s not only willing, but also more than able to foot the bill when it comes. “When a woman has economic means of her own — which many older women do — men love it,” she explains. “There’s something very alluring about a woman who can take care of a man and doesn’t necessarily need it to be the other way around.” Though many older women have bank accounts that reflect many more years of career earnings (or even alimony payments), you can still radiate financial independence — even if you’re on a tight budget. “Look for deals at hot restaurants or destinations offered through sites like LivingSocial or Groupon,” Bidwell suggests. “Make a reservation for you and your date, but call ahead to cash in the voucher; that way, it’s already been taken off the check once the bill arrives for you to pay. You’ll look like a big spender, but he’ll be none the wiser.”

Reason #5: Older women aren’t coy about making the first move

Both Bidwell and Dr. Schwartz say that perhaps the sexiest thing about older women is their readiness to take the lead — be it asking for a date, kissing someone or simply initiating a conversation. “Forget The Rules — what makes these women irresistible to men is their assertiveness,” says Bidwell. “Sometimes, being in the passenger’s seat and not the driver’s seat is the biggest turn-on for a man. I can’t tell you how many men have told me that they find it incredibly sexy when a woman confidently approaches to say that she finds him attractive, offers to buy him a drink, or even tells him what she likes in the bedroom.” In order to channel this type of self-assuredness, Dr. Schwartz advises simply acting like you know what you’re doing — and that you’re enjoying it. “When making the first move with a man, do so without hesitation — even if you have to fake your confidence! Men like to know that their partner is very excited and happy to be doing whatever they are doing together… not that it’s taking up all the courage that this person can muster,” she explains. When you show pleasure, comfort and confidence in everything you do, it will be hard for men to resist you, asserts Dr. Schwartz.

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Are Cougars Supposed to be Dominant in Relationships?

cougar dating younger menYou might be surprised to hear our thoughts on cougars and domination.

Because cougars are older than cubs, and because with age comes power, lots of people believe that cougars are always going to be a dominant party in relationships with cubs. At CougarLure.com, we have a pretty liberal and adaptable understanding of relationships. Our philosophy is that while some cougars might be dominant, there isn’t any reason for a cub not to be.

We’d like to make it clear that we look at ‘dominant’ in a context of decision making in the relationship and control of the sexual environment. As far as the former is concerned, cougars are much more likely to have a better idea of where things should go and how quickly things should progress. They’re also likely to know about going out for dinner, staying the night and general relationship happenings that a cub might not have experience with. Naturally, a cougar could be very career-focused and completely in the dark about these things, whereas the cub is experienced and knows exactly what’s going on. While cougars typically have time on their side, it doesn’t mean they’re any better prepared for controlling a relationship than a cub is.

Cougars are often cited as having high sex drives and a desire to get exactly what they want. We’ve always thought that this is true in a lot of cases, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that they will be dominant in bed. Some women like to be taken control of and completely dominated by a male: there’s nothing wrong with this, and it’s even okay to instruct your cub on how to make sure he’s giving you the best submissive experience possible. Sexually, cougars are every bit as entitled to be submissive as their cubs are.

To put things simply, it totally depends on the individuals in the relationship. Yes, cougars have an advantage over cubs when it comes to making decisions and doing things, but this doesn’t mean that they’re going to be dominant or overly instructive. Enjoy the type of relationship you want – don’t think that being a cougar means you have to be domineering.

If you’re submissive, be submissive. If you’re dominant, be dominant. Relationships are complicated and there’s nothing wrong with a cougar being in either role.

 

Top Five Reasons for Young Men to Date a Cougar

Top Five Reasons for Young Men to Date a CougarWhen you are looking for love, the most desirable quality is when you feel comfortable no matter what the age difference is. According to some, age is just a number and it does not really matter. Look at Jennifer Lopez and Demi Moore, isn’t it that they date younger men? What makes an older woman so attractive? Today people are more liberated and most young people do not follow what the society dictates them to do. Tabus are getting less and less relevant. Here are some of the reasons why young men love to date older women:

Reason 1. Older women have more life experience.

To have a relationship with an older woman is easier because she understands what you want and what she wants. They already known who they are, generally cry a lot less than their younger counterparts. Maybe not all the time, but a lot more than younger women, they make wise decisions about themselves and people close to them. Older women are far better rounded; they know what they feel and why they feel it.

Reason 2. Older women give better advice and are more supportive.

They help younger men through career crises. They show him support in work and play. Older women make their words count and assist you with action, very often they will know your mood and right antidote for your blues. A younger man who keeps himself around a very supportive older woman is in for a treat, not just in bed.

Reason 3. There’s no pressure to settle down

Unlike younger women, older women had passed the age for planning a wedding and having kids so they are not waiting for you to give them a ring. If a young man has no plans to settle down just yet, having an affair with an older woman is a great move. Relationship revolves around you two and your feelings, and you never get to hear those dreaded five words: where is this relationship going?

Reason 4. Cougars can pay the bill

It’s a pride for a young man to take his woman to an expensive romantic date. However, it is also fantastically sexy for a woman who has the capacity and willingness to pay the bill during a romantic date. Men awfully love that kind of move because its sending a message like, hey I can take good care of you financially and emotionally.

Reason 5. No Drama

How many times have you been with this beautiful sexy chick with the mind of a spoiled little girl, you know: whiny, dramatic, complaining, spoiled little princess expecting everything to be about her? In cougar relationship, you are the catch, the woman is lucky to be with you. And most of the time if you just ask nicely, she will be happy to make you a sandwich.

Just being youthful is not the measurement for being attractive and desirable, there are thousands of reasons why older women can win over younger women. A great dating site for cougar relationships can be found here: http://www.cougarlure.com so go and get a sexy cougar lady for yourself!

Article Source: http://ezinearticles.com/

How to Be a Cougar

cougar looking for younger manLadies, why restrict yourselves to the company of older men when it comes to dating? Men have been dating much younger women for years, and a growing number of women have decided to keep company with younger men. Don’t let Demi Moore have all the fun. Here’s how you, too, can become a cougar.

1. Look at younger men in a whole new light. You don’t have to slip him your daughter’s phone number. Slip him yours instead.

2. Remember that age is only a number. You may be 10 years older or more, but that doesn’t mean that a younger man can’t or won’t think of you as an attractive, sexy woman.

3. Laugh at the people rude enough to point out the age difference between you and your prey. Sure, he may be barely old enough to buy his own beer, but if he is old enough to purchase alcoholic beverages, he’s old enough to figure out what he wants. Maybe what he wants is you.

4. Flaunt what you’ve got. Identify an exceptional feature to accentuate. Find a way to highlight your long legs, killer smile or great derriere. Go for a sexy and classy look that men will find alluring, and leave the trashy stuff for Britney and Paris.

5. Dare to improve yourself physically and educationally. Part of the cougar’s allure is that she is at the top of her game. She hasn’t stagnated or let herself go. Take a class, head to the gym or travel to a place that has always intrigued you. Besides, those locations can be excellent hunting grounds.

Cougar Looking For A Younger Man At: www.cougarlure.com

Tips For Cougar Dating Younger Men

dating younger menAre you want to dating a younger man? Do you find that a young man would ultimately dump and abandon you for a lady young in her years? If so, you certainly aren’t the only older woman that thinks in that way. With the culture of younger woman older man relationship dynamics so prevalent in society, reversing the norm could be a revolutionary ordeal, driving women to choose powerful older men than just settle for a younger buck. However, there are many ladies that have realized the importance of emerging over society expectations and are mingling with younger men that can keep up with her hot vibrant self.

<1>Never think you’re a “Cougar”

Women don’t want to be associated with such a term that gives an implication of being on a prowl looking for younger men to pounce on. By relating your relationship to the term, you might just be damaging your companionship with a man much younger. The young man may be attracted to you and it’s best to keep the association as normal as possible.

<2>Just be confident

Men get attracted to women that exhibit confidence regardless of their age. It plays in your favor as younger girls are more insecure and are still figuring out how it is to date these guys. The older lady is already established and has had her time of playing these games with guys her age. So, she is aware of all that stuff and will never pretend. This is one thing that attracts the younger man to the elegant wiser older lady. Whatever you age may be, remember you can offer a great deal to any man at this point of time.

<3>Date fearlessly

This isn’t your first instance of dating and knowing what you want from a relationship. What are you interested in – a fling, committed-relationship, or just a rewarding companionship? You’re not naïve and you know that the man you’re dating is the right fit. So, either way that man isn’t going to make or break you. The maturity is another attribute that attracts younger men to older women. It takes a great deal of pressure off their shoulders and they continue to date until they decide if they want to seal the relationship. A date is just a date and it isn’t about getting hitched, so your world isn’t crushed since that single young man did not pay attention to you.

<4>Don’t assume the man will cheat in the relation

With age people tend to feel insecure and for a woman dating a young guy that is but obvious. If the guy is a cheater it doesn’t quite matter how old you are, he will still do that. In fact, some older women think that the relationship won’t be viable. As long as the communication is good and the relation involves respect, there’s no reason why it should not work out. Never put an expiration date for relationships unless you’re in mind for a fling.

<5>Knowing when you say goodbye

With an older woman it’s about giving love and ensuring that the other person is happy. It might be that when you both started off with the relationship, the young guy was still evolving in his career trying to come to his own. Both of you grew close together and at times fell apart. Although letting someone go can be painful, yet for the sake of happiness of both, it’s good to understand when to pull the line.

Making a decision to date a young man isn’t intriguing and is certainly fast catching on. As long as both are happy in each other’s company, the difference in age should not matter at all. If you’re fit for each other, even dating a man of your age is just the same as is with being someone young.

Online dating: 6 rules to help find the ideal partner

My worst dating experience began promisingly. I’d met a guy online – he was interesting and handsome, and we had great conversations. When he asked me out, it was a no-brainer, and when we met, he actually looked better than he did in his profile photos. He was smart, funny and had a great job. Midway through our date, his phone started buzzing. It was his wife. Supposedly they’d separated very recently, but he was still living in their house and she very much thought their relationship was intact.
older women dating younger man

No doubt you have a terrible dating story (or many stories) of your own. Even after that terrible date, my friends and family told me I was being too picky, and that unless I relaxed my standards, I’d never get married. Ultimately, I decided that was ridiculous. If I was looking for someone to spend the rest of my life with, why wouldn’t I be as choosy as possible?

So I began a month-long experiment, analysing the profiles of popular online daters and their behaviour on dating sites. What I discovered surprised me, to say the least. It also led me to my husband. Here are my top 6 tips for online dating based on my experience.

1.Keep score

Once you’ve thought of all the traits you want in a mate, prioritise them. Think about the characteristics in the context of previous relationships, your friends and your family. Develop a scoring system. Allocate points to your top 10, and fewer points to a second set of 10‑15 characteristics. Decide the lowest number of points you’ll accept in order to go out on a date with someone. This is basically developing a handcrafted algorithm, just for yourself.

2.Get online

Pick a few websites to use. Cougarlure.com is a more general environment with a lot of options. People who use Tinder tend not to be looking for long-term relationships. It’s OK to use two or three sites at a time. Bear in mind that you’ll want most of the features activated, and that some sites can be expensive.

3.Go shopping

For the most part, dating sites aren’t doing anything particularly mysterious. Sites mostly create taxonomies and match users based on their answers. In some cases, sites look at the gap between users’ answers and their behaviours. For example, you might say that you prefer a very tall man with dark hair who is religious, but mainly click on profiles for shorter atheists. The algorithm in that case would try to match you according to your behaviour. But maybe you’re clicking on all of the profiles, even those that don’t match your preferences, or sitting next to your sister, and she’s also looking for a boyfriend – one who’s short and blond. In that case, the algorithm won’t work either. It’s best to treat dating sites as giant databases for you to explore.

4.Keep your profile short

Long profiles typically didn’t fare well in my experiment. I think that for thoughtful women, or women who are quite smart, there’s a tendency to give more of a bio. Popular profiles were shorter and intriguing.

older women dating younger man

5.Be selective

It’s good to give examples of your likes and dislikes, but bear in mind that you may inadvertently discourage someone by getting too specific about things that aren’t ultimately that important. I love Curb Your Enthusiasm. As it turns out, my husband particularly dislikes that show. If I’d have gone on and on about Larry David in my profile I wonder if he’d have responded.

6.Use optimistic language

In my experiment, I found that certain words (“fun”, “happy”) made profiles more popular. Talk about what excites you, or paint a picture of a really great day that you would want to be a part of. Would you date you?

2 Reasons Older Women Love To Date Younger man

Have you ever wondered why older women dating younger man? What’s the big deal anyways?

So many guys ask me what is up with older women dating younger man. There is actually an evolutionary psychological theory surrounding this common “phenomenon.” There have been many studies conducted exploring the reasons behind older women dating younger man.
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Women in all categories prefer younger partners. Studies show older women prefer youth and handsome first for mate selection and man choose women who offer resources and stability. It’s no surprise there are a number of websites emerging and profiting from these “mutually benefiting” relationships. The “successful older woman” seeking “young attractive male” is common place. Let’s reveal some of the reasons behind older women dating younger man.

1. Her having a mid-life crisis. Well this is an easy explanation. Women, who feel they’ve been “tied down” for far too long or what he considers a marriage of obligation, feel as if her been cheated of her youth and her “fun years.” It’s as if she seeks a younger man to replace her older HB and convince herself somehow dating a younger man will bring back his youthfulness and give her a second chance to have fun again.

A sexy dating a younger man is not like having a time machine. This is about the same time she spends her money more freely on extravagant man toys, replaces her wardrobe, invests in hair club for women and maybe hires a personal trainer. Some women date  younger man to prove to themselves they haven’t lost her touch.

2. Women assume all man their age are like their partner. As the saying goes, “Once burnt, twice shy.” Some women have this ridiculous belief man their own age are all the same. I’ll share an example. If her had a bad experience with her partner going through menopause, frankly it scares the crap out of him to think about having to go through it all over again with someone new.

Menopause seems to be a cause for many failed marriages or at least that’s what some women I’ve talked with blame it on. If she ever been online dating or on a few sour blind dates with a man who’s still bitter about her break up; all of a sudden she thinks they’re all like that.
Younger man, who have never been in a serious relationship or “tainted” by a bad marriage seem like a great option for an older women, believing this will be a stress and drama free relationship. Unfortunately for her, she assumptions about dating a younger man being “hassle-free” may be very, very wrong. Most relationship require work and cooperation to make it successful.
Thankfully not all older women seeking younger man for a relationship. When you consider what makes a successful long-term, healthy relationship last, age is just one consideration in a number of relationship factors to consider. (more…)