Because cougars are older than cubs, and because with age comes power, lots of people believe that cougars are always going to be a dominant party in relationships with cubs. At CougarLure.com, we have a pretty liberal and adaptable understanding of relationships. Our philosophy is that while some cougars might be dominant, there isn’t any reason for a cub not to be.
We’d like to make it clear that we look at ‘dominant’ in a context of decision making in the relationship and control of the sexual environment. As far as the former is concerned, cougars are much more likely to have a better idea of where things should go and how quickly things should progress. They’re also likely to know about going out for dinner, staying the night and general relationship happenings that a cub might not have experience with. Naturally, a cougar could be very career-focused and completely in the dark about these things, whereas the cub is experienced and knows exactly what’s going on. While cougars typically have time on their side, it doesn’t mean they’re any better prepared for controlling a relationship than a cub is.
Cougars are often cited as having high sex drives and a desire to get exactly what they want. We’ve always thought that this is true in a lot of cases, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that they will be dominant in bed. Some women like to be taken control of and completely dominated by a male: there’s nothing wrong with this, and it’s even okay to instruct your cub on how to make sure he’s giving you the best submissive experience possible. Sexually, cougars are every bit as entitled to be submissive as their cubs are.
To put things simply, it totally depends on the individuals in the relationship. Yes, cougars have an advantage over cubs when it comes to making decisions and doing things, but this doesn’t mean that they’re going to be dominant or overly instructive. Enjoy the type of relationship you want – don’t think that being a cougar means you have to be domineering.
If you’re submissive, be submissive. If you’re dominant, be dominant. Relationships are complicated and there’s nothing wrong with a cougar being in either role.